Chapter #40: Embracing the Unexpected
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Feeling My Shelf is a bi-weekly newsletter about books, life, and well, life with books. Grab your favorite caffeinated beverage and get comfy. First up, some recent reads.
This Could Be Us by Kennedy Ryan
One word to describe the second book in Kennedy Ryan's Skyland series? Everything. Another five-star read! It follows Soledad, a recently divorced mother of three who embarks on a journey to self-love and rediscovery and soon finds herself smitten with a man that she shouldn't be smitten with, to say the least. That's all I can say without spoiling things. A little bit of spice and a whole lot of sweetness; I read it extra slowly just to savor it all. And it featured a nice little throwback line to Before I Let Go that had me cracking up again.
Bye, Baby by Carola Lovering
I didn’t think it could be done, but Carola Lovering did it. She wrote a character I hate even more than Tell Me Lies’ Lucy. Honestly, toxic doesn’t even describe the friendship between spineless Billie and she-devil Cassie, childhood best friends who’ve since grown apart. Secrets. Lies. A missing baby. This book is like a car crash—a well-written, anxiety-inducing, can’t-look-away-even-if-you-wanted-to crash. I was engaged and irritated the entire time, which is good. It’s a page-turner! But ugh, Billie was such a lost, sad character. I wanted to shake and hug her at the same time. Cassie, on the other hand? I’ve only got violent thoughts about her.
How is it already the end of March?
The beginning of the year brought a whirlwind of change, shaking the foundations of my carefully laid plans. Much like I do every January, I mapped out every detail of the months ahead in my new Papier planner, convinced that I held the reins of my destiny firmly in my grasp.
Excuse the hell out of me.
Quarter one of this year has seriously humbled me. More than once over the last three months, I've been forced to step outside of my comfort zone to lean into the discomfort of uncertainty—at work, with relationships, writing, and more. Almost nothing has gone according to plan. Case in point: today is Thursday, so my newsletter is officially late this week!
Usually, this would make my skin itch. Spontaneity has often felt like a foreign concept, a deviation from the carefully orchestrated script I've crafted for my life. But curveballs have slowly grown on me this quarter—particularly in the last few weeks, as I've seen how many good(!) things happen when Control Freak Alexis takes some time off. In embracing the unexpected, infinite possibilities beyond my carefully constructed boundaries have emerged.
Less thinking, more doing. Words start pouring out of my brain onto blank pages. Praise starts rolling in at work. And I begin to experience the intense dopamine hit that comes with letting the wall around my heart down a little bit—finally.
It has been challenging. There were moments of doubt and hesitation, moments where my type-A instincts screamed for order and structure. Overthinking reared its ugly head, but speaking some of my fears out loud to a few confidants—instead of bottling them—has allowed me to surrender to the flow of life's unpredictable currents.
Old habits die hard, so this isn't the end of plan-making per se. It's just a promise that I'm stepping forward with a heart full of curiosity and a soul open to whatever's yet to come.
From the books I’m looking forward to reading in 2024 to why I love cardigans so damn much, here’s a look back at chapters from Q1!
Next on my list is Anita de Monte Laughs Last by Xochitl Gonzalez. This book follows "a first-generation Ivy League student who uncovers the genius work of a female artist decades after her suspicious death." I loved Xochitl's first book, Olga Dies Dreaming, so I'm excited about this one.
The new public intellectuals are all on TikTok. The most anticipated books of Spring 2024. Why everyone you know suddenly has main character syndrome. Author x brand collabs that just make sense according to
. Writing a book about grief isn’t always cathartic. Is it a betrayal to publish dead writers' books? How a box of The Notebook tissues became Broadway's hottest merchHey thanks for reading (typos, misplaced commas, and all)! If you'd like to (further) support this newsletter, forward this email to a friend who likes books with a recommendation to subscribe!
I just finished Bye, Baby, and my goodness you described that book and those characters so perfectly! I’ve been trying to describe it to people, and haven’t been able to find the words. Thank you😊
I haven't done Artists' Way but I've always been intrigued, so I look forward to hearing your thoughts when you're done!